By: Stan Popovich
Do you know someone who lost a loved one or a pet and they are extremely sad?
Many people who lose someone special can have a difficult time getting over their grief.
Understanding The 7 Stages of Grief
Grief is a complex and personal journey that occurs in waves and layers. The 7 stages of grief provide a framework to help us understand and move through these challenging times.
Not everyone will experience every stage of grief, nor will they go through the stages in any set order or length of time. Knowing the typical stages of grief may help you process and make sense of your healing process.
1. Shock: This stage may involve numbed disbelief in response to news of a loss. It may serve as an emotional buffer to prevent someone from feeling overwhelmed. Feelings of shock are unavoidable, even if we feel we have had time to prepare for the loss of a loved one. People in shock may appear to be behaving normally without a lot of emotion, because the news hasn’t sunk in yet.
2. Denial: During this stage of grief, it is hard for your brain to comprehend your current situation. Denial is your brain’s way of spacing out your feelings of grief, allowing you to acknowledge and experience what you can handle in the moment. As you begin to accept the loss and what it means for your life now, your denial will begin to diminish.
3. Anger: During this stage, an individual may direct their anger toward the person who died, doctors, family members, and God. This replaces the numbness of shock and denial. It is important to address the anger. But under all that anger is your pain. Allowing yourself to express your feelings helps you process your grief. Remember that anger is a feeling that needs to be expressed.
4. Bargaining: Bargaining involves thoughts such as “I will do anything if you take away the pain.” This stage may come at any point within the grieving process. You think about what you could have done to prevent the loss. You may also feel guilty for not spending more time with the person.
5. Depression: At this stage, a person may experience feelings of emptiness and sadness. Emotional withdrawal and sadness are typical during this phase. Individuals may isolate themselves from friends and family during this time and be detached and uninterested in activities and things they enjoy.
6. Testing: Testing is the process of trying to find solutions that offer a means of dealing with loss. The testing stage involves trying different things that help you move forward. In this stage, you are starting to build your new normal as well as processing your feelings and emotions. You start finding practical ways to cope.
7. Acceptance: Acceptance is where you reach a point where one can acknowledge the loss and begin to move forward. Acceptance does not mean people feel OK. They understand that while life will go on. This stage may involve reorganizing roles and forming new relationships.
How Christians View Death
Here is how Christian’s view grief and death based on the Bible’s perspective. This can help in the grieving process.
1. Understand how death works: Death is the bridge between this world and God`s world which we call Heaven. When a person dies, they are crossing the bridge from this world to Heaven. As long as the person has accepted God/Jesus in their life, they will enter Heaven. The best way to understand how the process works is by talking to a priest or minister for more information.
2. You will see your loved ones again: The good news is that if you accepted God/Jesus into your life, there is a very good chance you will see your loved ones again including your pets. They are in Heaven along with everyone else. Remember that nothing is impossible with God.
3. You are not saying goodbye: Your loved ones and your pets are not gone, and you will see them again if you accept God/Jesus during your time on Earth. The key is that you need to rely on the promises of God and the Bible. Understanding how the process works will reduce your grief because you know that you will see your loved ones again.
4. Death is not final: Contrary to what everyone may think, death is not final if you accept God/Jesus in your life. Put your faith in God and rely on what is written in the Bible. You have two choices. You can listen to other people’s perspectives on death or put your faith in Jesus. Remember that God is in control and all you need to do is to have faith.
Coping Mechanisms for Grief
1. Embrace your emotions: Grief goes over every part of the emotional spectrum. Allow yourself to feel these emotions without judging. Accept them, understand them, and let them flow through you.
2. Write it down: Journaling provides a safe harbor for your feelings, memories, and thoughts. Write and let your thoughts flow like waves on the page. This process can bring clarity, understanding, and a sense of release.
3. Create a routine: Loss can leave us adrift from our familiar routines. Rebuilding structure can offer stability and comfort. Make a routine that includes activities that bring you peace and happiness. You could take a walk on the beach or read a book at your favorite park.
4. Physical activity: Exercise is a powerful tool for dealing with grief. It releases endorphins, natural mood chemicals that can help calm the storm inside.
5. Seek solitude and reflection: Give yourself time for quiet reflection and solitude. In these moments, you can genuinely process your thoughts and feelings. Consider incorporating mindfulness practices such as meditation.
6. Join a support group: Joining a local mental health group can be helpful. Take it one day at a time and try to make the effort of being active with others in your community. Getting involved in a social activity can increase your chances of making new friends and can reduce loneliness.
7. Talk to a counselor: Seek help from a mental health counselor or grief coach who can give you additional insights on how to deal with losing a loved one. A counselor can give you advice and ideas on how to overcome your depression when someone passes away.
8. Pray and include God in your life: Including God in your everyday living can help reduce your sadness. You can talk to a priest or minister for some guidance regarding your feelings and concerns. Spending time with God and asking God for help in your time of sadness can be of great comfort.
The Best Way to View Grief
Many people feel that their loved ones are gone, and they will never see them again. This is not true if you believe in God. Your loved ones are in Heaven with God including your beloved pets. It doesn’t matter how others view death. The only person who has the final say is God/Jesus. Nobody else’s opinions matter.
Read the Bible on what happens after you die. Pray to God and ask for his help. Accept God/Jesus in your life. If you do these things, you will see your loved ones again. Nothing is impossible with God/Jesus. Focus on Him and Him alone and don’t worry what anyone else thinks.
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