By: Stan Popovich
Have you ever experienced being bullied?
It can be very scary and stressful when someone gets on your case on a regular basis.
Fortunately, there are things that you can do to help deal with a bully in your life.
What is Bullying?
Bullying is when people repeatedly and intentionally use words or actions against someone or a group of people to cause distress and risk to their wellbeing. These actions are usually done by people who have more influence or power over someone else, or who want to make someone else feel less powerful or helpless.
Bullying Comes in Different Types
1. Verbal bullying means saying or writing mean things. Verbal bullying can include teasing, name-calling, taunting, and threatening to cause harm.
2. Social bullying involves hurting someone’s reputation or relationships. Social bullying can include leaving someone out on purpose, telling others not to be friends with someone, spreading rumors about someone, and embarrassing someone in public.
3. Physical bullying involves hurting a person’s body or possessions. Physical bullying can include hitting/kicking/pinching, spitting, tripping/pushing, taking or breaking someone’s things, and making mean or rude hand gestures.
The Effects of Bullying
Students and adults who are bullied are more likely to develop depression. The most common signs of depression include sleep problems, appetite changes, emotional disturbances, and thoughts of suicide. Children who experience depression may lose enjoyment in activities.
Bullying can make students and adults more likely to develop anxiety. Anxiety makes it harder for people to form relationships with friends, peers, and other adults.
Bullying can happen in schools, at home, at work, and online. Bullying can be physical, verbal, emotional, and it also includes messages, public statements, and online behavior intended to cause distress or harm.
How You Can Deal with a Bully
1. Show people that you have confidence: It is important to believe in yourself and that you display confidence when dealing with conflict. Bullies tend to bother people who are unsure about themselves, so it is important that other people know that you have self-confidence. This will prevent a bully from targeting you.
One way to increase confidence in yourself is through the martial arts. Martial arts offer a multitude of benefits, and one of the most significant is the boost in self-confidence. Through physical fitness, skill development, goal achievement, positive reinforcement, and self-defense training, individuals of all ages can experience increased self-esteem, resilience, and belief in their own abilities.
2. Tell a trusted adult: Adults in positions of authority, like parents, teachers, or coaches, often can deal with bullying without the bully ever learning how they found out about it. It’s vital to report bullying if it threatens to lead to physical danger and harm. Stalking, making threats, and physical attacks are very serious and when they’re not reported, they give the bully license to become more and more violent.
Write down what happened, when it happened, and who was involved. If the bullying is online, keep the evidence – save or copy any photos, videos, texts, e-mails or posts.
3. Take care of yourself: Given how bullying can cause harm to your physical and mental well-being, doing whatever you can to care for yourself is essential. Do what feels good and what allows you to feel confident. Connect with hobbies or activities where you can experience joy and engage in healthy relationships.
4. Stand up for yourself: Stand your ground when dealing with conflict from others. This will show people that you will stick up for yourself
It’s important to address a bully. Make eye contact, stand up straight with your head high, speak in a strong voice, wash your hair, and wear clothes that show that you are confident in yourself. It’s not about how strong you are, but rather the willingness to show others that you won’t be taken advantage of.
5. There is safety in numbers: If you can, hang out with a group of friends. A bully will tend to go after somebody who is alone and by themselves. A bully will less likely bother you if they know that you have a group of people that will back you up. Having acquaintances can also go a long way in preventing someone from getting on your case.
6. Find others who share your interests: You may be able to make friends at a youth group, book club, or religious organization. Learn a new sport, join a team, or take up a new hobby such as chess, art, or music. Volunteering is a great way to feel better about yourself and expand your social network.
7. Never show them your emotions: If someone decides to get on your case, do not let the person know they are getting to you. Letting a bully know that they are bothering you will only make things worse. Never show the bully your fears or frustrations. Hopefully, the person will get tired of harassing you and they will find somewhere else to go.
Bullies want attention and gain satisfaction from making others feel hurt or uncomfortable, so reacting to them will only encourage them. Ignore them and deny them any power over you, and they’ll eventually leave you alone.
8. Talk to the person: If possible, talk to the person who is bothering you and ask why they are bullying you. Ask them if you did anything that made them angry. Apologize if you did something that wronged them.
Stay calm and be polite when talking to the person who is harassing you. Offer solutions that will help solve any misunderstandings. Hopefully, there may be a chance to reconcile with that person.
How You Can Get Help from Bullying
When you’re being bullied, having trusted people you can turn to for encouragement and support will ease your stress and boost your self-esteem and resilience. Talk to a parent, teacher, or counselor to get some advice. Connect with real friends and those who don’t participate in any kind of bullying.
You may want to talk to a mental health professional who can assist you with your situation. A counselor will be able to provide you with additional advice and insights on how to deal with your current problem.
Like What You Read?
You will greatly increase your chances of finding the answers to your mental health issues if you use my book, website articles, and my blog at the same time. You can also review the rest of my website to get a better idea of how my experiences and advice can help you. Consider getting my affordable book right now at PayPal, Amazon, or Barnes & Noble by clicking on Get Stan’s Book
